Monday, August 11, 2008

The truth behind the tears

My fears are stilled, at last. What had been a few days seemed like weeks. This thing, this darkness and depression that had come over me, had never left my side, has finally been removed to it's rightful place. I've always thought, "What could turn me from my God?" But, oh. A foggy mind and long ago thoughts quickly remove my eyes from where they should be. Surprising how easily I let it go.

The tears that I thought would run dry quickly, didn't.
They stayed and were my constant companion until I found the source. Finding the source is definitely not easy while your eyes are blurred with tears. And those thoughts. Ah, what thoughts so easily persuade me besides those spoken with a smooth tongue and a deceiving mind. "You? You, worthy? A beauty to unveil? Look at yourself. Please. Don't kid around." But those are thoughts of long ago. A battle I emerged victorious from months ago. Not one I left unfought. Then why so persuasive now? Perhaps because I need to fight it again. Not for me, no. For others. For the girls I plan to mentor, and love, in the upcoming weeks. Perhaps this is a bigger part of God's plan than I imagined.
But now, I'm back. I have rediscovered my worth, my beauty. My strength and confidence. Because He showed me the truth behind the tears.

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